The fact that you’re taking the time to read this article right now may mean that you’re in a good place at this point in your ministry year. You’re rested, energized, encouraged, in the zone, not stressed, and all caught up. For the mere mortals reading this, the previous sentence has reminded you that you’re anything but in a state of ministry nirvana. The reality might be that you are reading this article because you’re trying to escape or avoid every task, commitment, demand, and promise that’s closing in on you.

How does that happen? How can it be that we anticipate a day, or a week, or a break, or even a summer to get caught up only to see the time evaporate and, often, get even more crammed with life? I don’t think anyone makes New Year’s resolutions to burn out.

Before you put this article down and rush to do the next thing, I wonder if you would take a minute right now to put down the paper or pry your fingers off the computer, and take a deep breath—a life-giving breath—the kind that actually appreciates the oxygen going in and reminds you that you are alive.

Now, take another deep breath with your mind and heart and ask yourself some really probing questions: “Am I on the verge of exhaustion? If it seems that I am, what’s really going on?”

Sure there are crises and unexpected demands. Sure life isn’t neat and tidy. But below the surface of wind and waves, what is the condition of your life deep down? Down here one may find that the real turbulence isn’t in the schedule but in one’s own soul. The cure isn’t to get energized on your to-do list, but to pursue a potentially scary, more deep and probing step that moves you beyond surface solutions.

Thinking deeply about the why of your exhaustion may make you even more anxious than the sentence that made you anxious at the beginning of this article. As a fellow traveler on the journey who feels equally intimidated by the process, I offer the following thoughts on exhaustion for you to consider.

Exhaustion can happen when you stop stopping
If you don’t take a day off, exhaustion gets a foothold. Hopefully you either have it in your job description or it’s in your overall plan for life. I’m not your supervisor, but if I might be a voice of reason, hear this: I give you permission to take your day off. Get out of the office. Turn off the planning. Do something that fills you: read something that is irrelevant, run toward no destination, bike for fun, write poetry, watch a movie, see friends, daydream. Do something this week that is life giving. Rage against that gerbil wheel of exhaustion.

Am I on the verge of exhaustion? If it seems that I am, what's really going on?

Exhaustion can happen when you stop reflecting
If I might take you a bit deeper, have you ever wondered why resting is so difficult? An older gentleman used to stretch my thinking on my use of time. When I would tell him that I couldn’t take time off, he would ask me, “Who’s telling you that?” I’ve taken that to heart and often will ask youth pastors and volunteers this question when they say that they can’t or shouldn’t or ought not to.

What voices are speaking to you inside your head? Who are you trying to please, impress, or compete with? These very voices in your soul may be running you down by their shouts, criticisms, and shaming. Many try to drown out the voices with external activity. This is like trying to cure a terminal disease by working out. Name the deep and dangerous voices and tell them that they no longer have power to manipulate you.

Exhaustion can happen when you forget that you’re not Jesus
One of the temptations in ministry is to believe the voices of expectation that want you to save every kid, cure every hurt, and solve every problem. The trouble is that youth pastors begin to believe it. This creates a confusing identity for a number of reasons. First, anyone who thinks he is Jesus, well, that’s just not possible. Second, it creates an unrealistic perspective. The hardest part of ministry is admitting that ministry is never done. When you hit the pillow at night, God asks, “Well done?” not “All done?”

Exhaustion can happen when you stop keeping the private, private
Just reflecting on your current condition might not be enough. As youth pastors, you are in the public eye and this adds another dimension that dynamically eats away at your private life. Spirituality can become a profession. Friends (and kids) become examples, every thought becomes a message, and our times with God become examples rather intimate times with our Maker.

I’m not suggesting that there is a neat separation between private and public, only that one must resist turning every private moment into a public illustration. Private moments are for intimacy where followers allow themselves to be known by God and to treasure these things in their hearts. Keep them there and call upon them when you need to be reminded of whom you are and that you are loved by God as a daughter or a son.

Exhaustion can happen when you stop reaching out
Working through any of the above ideas might make youth pastors feel ashamed, which perpetuates the exhaustion problem. It’s tempting to hold it together when inside you’re dying. It’s tempting to think that you can work it out on your own rather than attempt to work it out in community.

While one shouldn’t make every private moment a public illustration, there are times for you to be honest about your journey with your volunteers. They need to see your own pursuit of God and wholeness, as they are fighting exhaustion in their own life journeys. Maybe more volunteer meetings need to be dedicated to “How are you?” rather than “What are we planning?”

I remember one semester; I had my volunteers simply tell their stories of where they had been and where they currently were. The connectedness and support we began to feel did so much more than a clearly defined mission statement.

Hopefully these thoughts haven’t wasted your time. Maybe the time you have spent reflecting on these things has kept you from getting some things done. If so, let me congratulate you and tell you you’re on your way in a healthy direction.